drop the dead donkey

Drop The Dead Donkey: George’s Wedding?

Published 26th March 2021

There is something very suspicious about Series 4 of Drop the Dead Donkey, you know. And it involves poor old downtrodden news editor George Dent.

For years, we’ve heard about his dreadful life with Margaret, his wife. About her cruelty towards him, about her affairs, about him having to go and sleep alone in the attic… and about how she eventually divorces him. This comes to a head early in the aforementioned Series 4, with “The Day of the Mum” (TX: 13/10/94). The day Margaret remarries.

Except brilliantly, rather than resulting in more misery for George, the episode culminates with his delicious revenge instead:

DAVE: Oh no, let me get this straight. You hired a beautiful call girl to accompany you to your ex-wife’s wedding just to rub her nose in it, and then you got this woman to make a pass at the groom… and ruined their wedding day. That’s what you did, isn’t it George?
GEORGE: Yes. That’s what I did. And it was the best £2000 I have ever spent.

Indeed, for a while, things begin to look up for George. In “Helen’s Parents” two weeks later, he’s met someone new. And not some “sad old spinster who’s picked up George because her favourite Labrador’s died”, as Henry so delicately puts it. She’s gorgeous.

GEORGE: I’d like you all to meet Anna, everybody.
ANNA: I am very pleased to meet you all.
GEORGE: Anna is from Poland.
ANNA: But now my English is quite good. One day I hope to even understand Loyd Grossman.

In case you thought the show would let George be happy for long, you are very much mistaken.¹ The very first time we see her alone with George in his office – “This is my wall planner – where I plan things… on my wall” – we are immediately suspicious of Anna’s reactions. The show doesn’t leave us with much mystery about her intentions towards him.

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Unlike in real life, where Jeff Rawle ended up marrying Nina Marc, who plays Anna, in 1998. And they’re still together. Awwwww. ↩

The Most Exciting VT Clock in the World

Published 15th March 2021

TV Comedy

I have so many things piled up, just waiting for me to find the time to watch. High on that list is Angels, which I’ve promised someone I’ll give a proper go, after they took the time to watch Tenko on my recommendation.

So, instead, I’ve… started my umpteenth rewatch of Drop the Dead Donkey. Oh well, whatever. We’re in the middle of a pandemic, I need my comforts. And you deserve your comforts as well. If you spend any kind of time reading this site at all, hopefully you’ll enjoy this little observation.

Let’s take a brief look at the final episode of Series 1, “The Big Day” (TX: 11/10/90). We’re not going to tackle the main plot, about whether it’s Henry or Sally who gets to interview Margaret Thatcher. Instead, we’re going to concentrate on the episode’s chorus: a friendly, if mildly irritating electrician.

Or more specifically, what’s on the monitor behind him. Surely that’s not…

Electrician with VT clock in the background

DROP THE DEAD DONKEY
INSERT 17
SHOW 10 INSERT A
AFRICA

Amazing. And just in case you thought that might be any old Drop the Dead Donkey VT clock, “The Big Day” is Show 10. And the very first VT insert of the show is indeed set in Africa, where Damien tempts a young child with chocolate before smacking them round the head to induce the requisite crying:

Child after just having been hit by Damien

Clearly, the team needed something technical to route to the monitor on-set in order to look the part, and just chose the output of the VTR machine used to play in the pre-records… hoping that we wouldn’t be looking too closely. They clearly thought I’d have better things to do in 31 years time. They were incorrect.

I can’t be arsed trying to identify the other 16 inserts used throughout the series, though. What, do you think I’m sad or something?

Drop the Dead Donkey: The Unbroadcast Pilot

Published 31st October 2018

TV Comedy

Drop The Dead Donkey pilot - Alex, Damien, Dave and George

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been obsessed with TV pilots.

TV pilots of all kinds. Shows which eventually made it to the screen virtually untouched as part of a series, like The Young Ones episode Demolition. Shows which made it to screen, but which were substantially or entirely reshot for the series proper, such as Citizen Smith. One-offs which aired, but never became a series – remember Mirrorball? And then there’s my favourite: pilots which were never broadcast, either because they were never intended to be in the first place, or because substantial changes happened between the pilot and the series… or because they were a complete fucking disaster in every single respect.

There are so many of these unbroadcast pilots I’d love to see. There’s the 1986 pilot Dungeon Doom… followed by a second, also unbroadcast pilot under the more familiar name Knightmare in 1987. Similarly, 1983 saw an unnamed pre-pilot, followed by a full pilot called UNTV… with a series appearing the year after, a certain Spitting Image. Then there’s Paul O’Grady’s version of The Generation Game, which by rights should have been the BBC’s big entertainment hit of 2003… and wouldn’t you just love to watch the two pilots they made to see exactly why that didn’t happen?

Occasionally, such pilots get to see the light of day on DVD, if they ended up as successful shows. Sherlock saw its unbroadcast 60 minute version of A Study in Pink released. The Day Today is one of the most obvious comedy examples, with the bare bones of the show there… but the visual panache of the series very much not. And then there’s Doctor Who, where the DVD set The Beginning contains the complete unedited pilot recording, and a brand new edit combining the best of all the raw session’s takes. Because, y’know, Doctor Who.

With comedy, it’s easy to wish so much more was released.¹ Blackadder is the most obvious example here, with a pilot which had never been officially put out on DVD, presumably due to somebody not wishing it to be out there.² Slightly further afield, I would do anything³ to see A Big Bunch of Hippies, the pilot for the underrated sitcom Hippies – and even if you didn’t like the show, its unbroadcast pilot was the last TV show scripted jointly by Arthur Mathews and Graham Linehan, which is surely of interest to the discerning comedy fan.⁴

But occasionally, we get lucky. Hello Drop the Dead Donkey, Channel 4’s truly excellent 90s newsroom sitcom… which actually released its unbroadcast pilot on DVD in 2005. And watching it in the context of that first series from 1990 is rather instructive.

Let’s instruct ourselves, shall we?

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Admittedly, comedy in general has it better than game shows, or entertainment shows in general. Duncan Norvelle’s pilot edition of Blind Date is the stuff of legend, ~~and we’ve never seen so much as a field of it~~. UPDATE: Thanks to Ben Baker, who points out that parts of this pilot were seen in the documentary Who Killed Saturday Night TV? Now I’ve just got to pluck up the courage to watch it. ↩
To be honest, it shuffles round the net so often like the proverbial video ghost that you’d think whoever it is might as well just throw up their hands, give in, and accept a few pennies out of it. ↩
Not actually anything. ↩
Yes, you there. Hello. ↩