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Posted 28th September 2012

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I am not an internet celebrity.

Still, type my name into Google, and – if you can get past cameramen and trumpet players – you can find a fair few traces of me online. There’s this site, where I bang on about nonsense. There’s Noise To Signal, where I used to bang on about nonsense. There’s Ganymede & Titan, where I bang on about Red Dwarf-related nonsense. And so on.

Now, I used to go to school with someone who was pretty similar to me. Not identical – he stuck his finger in places where I could only hope to stick it at that point – but we liked a lot of the same things. He was cooler, though. He had his own shed. He was a far better programmer than me (as in, he wrote things that could do more than play a CD roughly half the time you pressed the play button). Sure, I once beat him at a calculus question, but that was about it.

I lost touch with him years ago, but I sometimes wonder what happened to him. So occasionally, I type his name into Google. And what do I find? Precisely nothing.

This is something I come across time and time again. All the people I used to know – the nerds, who you’d think would have a fairly widespread net presence – I can find nothing. There are people I would expect to have reams and reams of blog posts attached to their name, or writing for some website or another, or even just have a page which listed a few electronics projects they were working on… but I can find absolutely sod all. And from conversations I’ve had with other people online, it seems I’m far from alone on this – a lot of old friends they would have expected to have a presence online have just disappeared into the ether.

What happened to them?

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Lauren platt on 8 October 2012 @ 11pm

I’m glad to see I’m not the only one who has noticed this odd way that people we have every reason to expect to be online in some way or other, aren’t.

I can’t explain it; one of my closest school friends is on facebook, and posts the sort of family nonsense we all do, but all the others? Nothing. Not a trace.

I probably wouldn’t find this as irritating if it wasn’t for the fact that I have an imdb page, and bloody well want them to see my name in almost lights. Damn them.